We’ve all been there…

Feeling pretty shitty about work, life, family, friends, obligations, responsibilities yada, yada, yada… Like we’re spiraling downwards in slow motion and nothing to grasp onto but more negativity and the misery that ensues.  can honestly say I get this way EXACTLY twice a year.

The first always rolls around during my birthday mid-July and the second happened right before THIS post.

Staying Positive

Something about aging in your 30’s that puts work/life balance in perspective.  Having turned 36 this summer (I know! Egads!) I’m not that freshly plucked spring chicken of yore… On the contrary, most days I feel like DOB/Day Old Bread that’s in the sale bin at the super market half-off, crusty centers, but cheap enough for someone to purchase and make something pretty brilliant out of stale leftovers.
I typically succumb to a few days of birthday blues before I slap myself back into reality, face the music (aka my full-length mirror) and proclaim
YOU ARE A MUTHA FUCKING BADASS BITCH!!! GET IT TOGETHER!!!!
Lol Seriously guys… The FIRST STEP to getting your groove back: Positive Reinforcement

If you don’t believe it, neither will anyone else.  The mind is a beautifully wondrous, often maniacal, torturous, loving, living, reathing thing that is simply waiting for its next command.  YOU are the owner of this brilliant mind. YOU tell it what to think.  YOU tell it how to act.

I am smart.  I am beautiful. I am slicker than your average _______________ (fill in the blank).
If you don’t proclaim it, I can assume you don’t believe it either.  So master this first step and DO NOT move forward unless you can easily and effortlessly check staying positive off the list.
Challenge Yourself
Fall has always been my favorite season for as long as I can remember.  Back to school with new ideas, a new wardrobe, and new friendships were always a highlight after long, languid summers with little stimulation.  However, with all this newness came the uncertainty, rearing its ugly head once again.  Am I good enough? Will I make new friends? Will my teachers like me?  Am I better than I was last year?

The start of a new school year signals the start of a brand new me, one that I could reinvent time and time again to break myself of the monotony that suffocates me in spite of all my past triumphant efforts.  But that’s the beauty of progress and growth.  You break yourself down so only YOU can build yourself back up again.  I’ve always been sadistic in that way.

My own WORST critic, pushing myself to achieve greater things, bigger projects when I could and should be happy with what I currently have.  BUT how can you grow if you don’t CHALLENGE yourself, right?

Which brings me to my next step to getting your groove back:

CHALLENGE yourself to do something, anything differently.

Hair still the same ol’ straight black that it was last 5 years?  Add highlights!

Jog 4 daily miles on the treadmill?  Try running outdoors for some fresh air and a change of scenery!

Only wear your luxury items on special occasions?  Rock that bad boy to the supermarket!

Allow the seasons to dictate your changes and get outta the rut guys!  Do whatever it takes to break the cycle of monotony!  That may be why you’re feeling so sluggish and depressed.
No change = no stimulation = no inspiration

Consistency is KEY

The first step is to actually admit that you have a problem, right?
The second is to talk yourself into happy thoughts.
The third is to take those thoughts and spring them into action.

The last step?  SO simple.  Be consistent. Consistent in your approach. Consistent in your efforts. Consistent in your actions.

So right before THIS post I was a raving lunatic.  I was feeling really lost and depressed about the direction of the blog.  I have been blogging for over 6 years and just felt like I lost my voice and the authenticity of my posts.  Every time I sat down to write, instead of pouring my heart out (like I am now) I simply uploaded some pictures and had a few things to say about my outfit and where you can find it.  I did this for months which turned into years.  As soon as I hit PUBLISH, instead of reeling with a sense of achievement, I beat myself up for allowing yet ANOTHER boring-ass basic post.
I am NOT basic. I am smart.  I am beautiful. I am slicker than your average #GIRLBO$$
You better believe it babes.
Because I do.
And in the end, I am all that matters.

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42 Comments

    • Thank you SO much for reading babe…it's a work in process! Always gotta strive to be better and more positive!

  1. This is fantastic. I like how you put things clearly and straight to the point. I've made some great changes to my life in the last 5 years but I'm entering a new stage with uni and I really want to do my best and make some good friends and connections so wish me luck and this post was fabulous! I've been lazy with exercise even though I know I need it to continue being healthy so I'm made it a point to start by walking our dog almost every night! Next is to go swimming once a week! We got this!

    • Thank you so much for your continued support after all these years babe <3 We're not alone and it's nice to know there's a huge community out there for like minded gals like us! XX

    • Aw thanks babe! Just spillin' from my guts…hope this bit helped you as much as it did for me <3

  2. Wow. This post is first of all, breath taking. I love your voice, how it resonates from the screen. I literally felt this way yesterday. I didn't feel like making dinner, I didn't feel like working, I didn't feel like blogging. I only felt like watching Tinkerbelle. In essence, I was a bit of a mess. But these are the posts that help lift me up. Its words like "be consistent" that truly get to you. Thank you for using your voice to send out this message. Because its something that everyone feels at some point. Also, your outfit, so so gorgeous, it actually took my breath away. I haven't seen anything so unique in a long time, and that is indeed refreshing.

    https://cynicalduchess.blogspot.com

    • Thank you SO SO much for reading and leaving such a candid comment babe! We all get in our little funks, it really helps to allow just a minute of wallowing then back to staying positive NO MATTER WHAT! We can do IT!!! <3

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